What defines you?
If someone asks you that question, what would you say?
A mother? A sister? A daughter? A friend? A teacher? A runner?
Yesterday in therapy, I made the statement that I was concerned about being defined by depression. "Don't let that happen. You are so much more than that Natalie." Yes, I am. We are all so much more than our mental health diagnosis, our jobs, our daily roles. I am a child of God and a wife who happens to suffer from depression. It's all about how I choose to prioritize who I am. Don't let others decide who you are. Decide for yourself!
Right now I am in the depths of recovery so it's hard not to let depression define me or my marriage. However, I am aware. Awareness is key. I am aware that one day I won't be focused on therapy, support groups, research, blogs. I am also aware that experiencing pain makes me appreciate joy even more. I have a friend I text with every morning and we both say, Good morning, today I am grateful for....... It holds me accountable. It makes me start each day with a positive. I'm here to tell you there are some mornings I want to grumble and send a complaint. But, I don't. Gratitude.
I made the statement Saturday to my parents and JT, "I wouldn't trade what I've been through for anything. I feel amazing and so much better than I ever knew I could." They all 3 looked at me like I was an alien. Mercy! They would trade all of the worry, guilt and sleepless nights I'm sure. Perspective.
I am not my depression.
xo...n
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