Frustrated for the rooms not painted, frustrated for the curtains not hung, frustrated for an empty dining room, frustrated for an unused front room, frustrated for the half clean garage.....clearly, I have let frustration rule my beautiful day. My first day alone in weeks and I framed it with frustration.
I had to stop, breathe and assess my coping skills. We had to develop a list of coping skills in therapy. These evolve as life evolves. One of mine includes a note I found in my phone from March 3rd. What is scary about this note is that I don't even remember typing it. Note, I have removed the drug name. Drug names are not discussed in group therapy so I have chosen to take that stance as well. We are all different chemically and what works for some may not work for others. It's easy to get bogged down in thinking that Drug x didn't work for her so it won't for me either.
As Scarlett said, "I can't think about that right now. If I do, I'll go crazy. I'll think about that tomorrow."
I've already gone crazy. Not interested in going back there. For now, I'll just chow down on this pizza with these cute kitties, watch an episode of Y&R and know that tomorrow is a brand new day full of hope.
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